Guilty as lavender?

The Roger Clemens press conference this afternoon was seemingly broadcast from Mars, it was so bizzare and slightly creepy. While he played a taped telephone conversation that he had with a distraught and tearful McNamee, Clemens was stoically shuffling papers. They talked about McNamee's very sick son. And McNamee kept asking him "what do you want me to do?" to which Clemens responded "I need somebody to tell the truth." Ok, I'll be somebody: Rocket, that shit was cold. Ice cold.

Other highlights (lowlights?)

-McNamee : "I'm in your corner. I'd also like not to go to jail, too."

-McNamee : "You treated me like family," and "I learned from you how to raise my kids" Didn't Clemens plunk his kid at the Astros training camp after the kid jacked one off him?

-McNamee: "I'm firing my lawyers. I'm getting rid of everybody. My wife is gone. My kids are gone."

-Clemens missed the funeral for his college coach's son to do this.

-Clemens sarcastically asking if he was allowed to drink water.

- "Do you think I played my career because I care about the Hall of Fame? ... If you have a vote ... you keep your vote,"

-That it's legal to tape phone conversations in New York and Texas as long as one party is aware. God Bless America.

- Clemens getting flustered and saying "I cannot wait to go into the private sector and hopefully to never have to answer it again. I've said enough." Dude, you were the one who kept coming back!!

-Almost Piazza-ing a reporter who asked him about Andy Pettite, especially when asked whether he thought Pettite was a cheater.

- The use of the term "rat's ass". The fact that his lawyer's name is Rusty.

- Trying (and failing) to "rise above his anger" and storming out at the end. Actually, that was kind of awesome.

- The awesomest, most-awesome part of all the press coverage. The AP article that mentioned that Clemens wore "a lavender, button-down shirt" for his 60 Minutes interview. What is this, Vogue? What the hell does that have to do with anything?